How do you get your team to come to work joyfully? Are you setting boundaries and expectations for performance in your aesthetic practice? The new role of the leader is to reveal inspiration in their people by managing energy away from drama and redirecting it toward results and happiness at work. 

Drama researcher, leadership guru, and New York Times best-selling author Cy Wakeman joined AmSpa President and CSO, Cathy Christensen, for a conversation about the common challenges in a medical spa workplace and how med spa owners, operators and practice managers can use reality-based leadership techniques to effectively manage their teams and reach their business goals.

For a masterclass on restoring sanity in the workplace and calling your team up to greatness, join Cy Wakeman at the Women in Aesthetics Leadership Conference October 3 – 5, 2025, at Terranea Resort in Rancho Palos Verdes, California. Her closing keynote, “Reality-Based Leadership: Ditch the Drama and Turn Excuses Into Results,” will give leaders the tools, techniques and proven coaching models to skillfully navigate the interferences of drama, hardwire personal accountability and help their teams deliver on their business goals. Learn more and register at experiencewalc.com. 

Get to Know Cy Wakeman

Cathy Christensen: Hi! Welcome to Medical Spa Insider. My name is Cathy Christensen. I am the President and CSO of the American Med Spa Association, and I am very, very honored and privileged today to welcome our Medical Spa Insider guest, Cy Wakeman. For those of you who don't know Cy Wakeman is an incredible human. She does incredible things. I'm very excited. She's actually going to be joining us at our Women in Aesthetics Leadership Conference in October, and we'll definitely talk about that, but I want you to get to know her a little bit. I had the opportunity to hear Cy speak last year at a different conference, and she kind of knocked my socks off.

Cy is what is known as a drama researcher. She's a New York Times bestselling author. She's 2023 world's number one leadership guru, who has been recognized for her reality-based approach to leadership. She has her master's in healthcare administration, which means she's very familiar with the medical industry and medical spa industry as an ancillary and kind of the personalities that exist there, and she just has an incredible approach to how do you manage in this day and age with folks who kind of span generations and ideologies, and all of that. So please welcome Cy Wakeman to the podcast. Hi, Cy!

Cy Wakeman: Hi, Cathy, thanks for having me. I'm excited for today, and also excited for October.

Cathy Christensen: Yes, absolutely. Can you tell us a little bit about yourself, Cy? I did the rote bio, but I want to hear more from you.

Cy Wakeman: My resume. As a human, I am the mother of 4 beautiful grown sons. I just had my 1st grandson. 

Cathy Christensen: Congratulations!

Cy Wakeman: I am an avid hiker and got to go to Everest Base Camp this year, so I like to challenge myself and stretch myself. But probably what people most know me for is, I was able to quantify through my studies as a social science researcher how much drama there is in the workplace. And drama to me is emotional energy, wasted energy that doesn't go towards results for our patients and clients or our own well-being. And so I managed a lot of physician practices both family practice and internal medicine, pediatric throughout kind of a regional referral network. And I also did a lot of inpatient. And so I got to see how we humans show up at work in all of our glory, and the things we do that help one another, and the things we do that hinder one another. So, I have a background as a therapist and social science researcher. 

So I was a social worker, went into healthcare administration and spent a lot of time in academic medicine and just working to bring out the best in providers, teams, you know those caring for patients and watched people at their best, and watched people sometimes at their worst and really started to pay attention to the difference, so that I could come out to leaders and say, ‘Here's how we can capitalize on what helps and do less of what hinders.’ So that's what I make a living doing is helping leaders lead better.

Cathy Christensen: That's incredible. That's one of the… The folks that are coming to the Women in Aesthetics Leadership Conference in October are leaders. And when I was developing the conference, one of the common woes that came up because it was kind of developed out of me having conversations with these people, and kind of talking about what their common pain points were, and 9 times out of 10 people management was the very top of the list. So I'm really excited to learn more about you, more about your approach. 
One thing we were talking about before when we jumped on the call is the medical spa field is kind of unique in the fact that people most people who are coming into the field are making a career change or a career transition because they have recognized the desire to have a more well-rounded life, better well-being, work in a happier place, and that happens most of the time. But it's interesting, your take on it was very interesting. I'd love for you to kind of share that with our listeners as well.

What Makes Med Spa Teams Unique

Cy Wakeman: Absolutely. And I've worked with a lot of people who have made those career transitions. And so, on the one hand, I love when we look at our reality clearly, and we say, you know, for my own well-being, my own health, I'm going to proactively choose a different work environment with different schedule. Maybe, you know, moving into a different service line that isn't as acute, or, you know, chronic. That's looking more well-being and preventative. I love the empowerment of that. The one thing we often do, though, is, we forget that wherever we go, there we are. Like we take our own self with us. And so whatever environment you're in, even if you're upgrading your environment, if you have outsourced your happiness and well-being as a person, or if you are a leader, who just believes you're kind of at the victim of your circumstances, and you get what you get. You don't throw a fit. You know people are hard to find. You will take drama with you. A geographical escape, if that's what you're doing, isn't automatically going to guarantee the life you're looking for. And so with a move to, you know, like an ancillary care service as better hours. And you know, maybe less pressure in different ways.

With that, we can underestimate the amount of self management that we need, and also as a leader, how we need to upskill to lead in current environments with current staff bases. And if we're under-skilled in any environment, we will have a lot of anxiety and a lot of stress. And so when people tell me they're very stressed as leaders, that they don't know what to do with these different diverse age groups and populations. They want me to fix their reality, and what I do is, I say, let me grow you. 

Let's upcycle you so that you can move through the current reality more skillfully and ultimately more lovingly, more kind and kinder and wiser. But yeah, so that's I just think, you know, it's one thing to change your environment. But we cannot escape our lessons of evolution, no matter where we go.

What Reality-Based Leadership Is

Cathy Christensen: Yeah, that's really, really wise. I think that is true. Like you, it's recognizing what you can control right? And I'm curious to hear. I know you're the guru on reality-based leadership. Can you define that for me?

Cy Wakeman: Sure reality-based leadership. I came up with that title for my work, because people would say, but you know, Cy, if only we had different people, or if we had more money, or if we had more ideal staffing, or if and it was like, we're outsourcing everything to when and if reality gets better. And I knew from the research that your happiness, not just the feeling, but your state of contentment is only about 10% related to your circumstances. And it's about 40% related to the amount of accountability you take for your circumstances. And about 50% is kind of genetic factors which we're all more equal than we think, 

And when people came to me, they always came to me as their leader to fix their reality. Will you make this person stop doing this? Or will you make sure we're ideally staffed? Or will you make sure that I'm never put in a situation where there's misinformation in the medical chart. like, can you fix the process? And while we want to improve the process and standard work is safe work and all the things we teach. the temptation is to fix their reality, which I knew was not sustainable, and I probably couldn't do, but I could grow them, given their current reality to move through it more skillfully. And so I would say things like, you know, well, what's your current reality? And they're like, well, this. But I want it different. I'm like, well, given this reality, let's focus on how we can. 

So reality-based leadership is first seeing your reality clearly.

Understand the Story vs. Your Reality

Cy Wakeman: Your story causes your stress, not the facts, especially medicine. We, you know, don't like it when it happens. But even when somebody's heart stops, that's not stressful to a highly trained person. We know exactly what to do and what to check. And you know where to position the team and how to move forward. So reality isn't what's stressful. We're trained for that. It's the story we make up about reality. I shouldn't have to do this. I shouldn't have worked this shift for somebody else. This person should have come in through a different avenue, or, you know, it's the story of we shouldn't have to, or this shouldn't be happening to me, or this always happens to me, or I have to do everything around here.

That's what causes our stress, not our reality. So the first thing in reality-based leadership as leaders. I teach you we're going to love people up. But then we're going to call them up to greatness, and we call them up to greatness. I'll teach you these tools first by cleaning up people's thinking, separating out facts from reality, and for those of your folks that have worked from a clinical standpoint, and now are leaders. We know this. The first notes we wrote as clinicians got edited. We had so much subjective connotation in there, and assignment of motive like, I remember, my first social worker notes were like 10 pages long on the patient, and you know they went through and just made a paragraph like patient presented, stated this, we discussed this. I offered 3 treatment options. They chose this. and so we know how to clean up our thinking. 

And then the second thing we do in reality is not ‘If only things were different.’ Given this reality, what's my part to play? What's my part in getting here. How do I enable this? How did I maybe not have a conversation I needed to have? And then, what is my point of impact for getting us to a different place.

And then the third one is next right action. And if we do the 1st 2 steps cleanly, our team members. Our staff will completely amaze us, because if I can help you clean up your thinking, which is the job of the leader, and I can help you find your place of impact. Here's where you can make a difference. What you will do next will be stunning, and most leaders think they need to manage the work of people, and I'm all about you got to manage the energy of people. and their work should be managed through our processes and our standard, you know, standardized care and our templates, and you know our evidence-based practice that should manage our work. But a leader manages the energy of people, and we tend to try and manage the behavior of people. And that's where we get to be fixers and stressors and exhausted. And we don't see people stepping up to their highest self. So that's reality-based leadership. Get clear in your thinking. Find your place of impact and let people do amazing things which they came to your particular service line to do.

How to Ground Your Reactions in Reality

Cathy Christensen: Yeah, no, that's amazing. It's, I think, one of the things that's really common. And I'm curious to hear your thoughts on it is reaction. Like immediate reaction to an issue. Especially if you're in a situation where I mean, I don't know that I've ever actually worked in a in a business where I have nothing but time to get to get everything done. So you know a lot of times. I'm just curious. How do you kind of take that reaction, that instinct to react? Is it good? Is it bad? And or is it just kind of indifferent? I'm curious on that? And then how do you, what's its role in a more like cleaning up your thinking kind of role.

Cy Wakeman: Sure. So a lot of our reactions are not grounded in reality, they're grounded in the story that we create about reality. And so in that way, the reaction is based, not on evidence. It's based on story. And so the reaction hardly ever helps. And you know, I tell people never meet the energy coming your way with like energy. So somebody coming in hot. I teach leaders to come in neutral. We're always co-regulating from the time you have a child if you choose to have children to, you know, if you're in a friendship or a partnership, we discount our role in co-regulation. So if somebody comes in, upset. The number one thing we can do is manage the energy of the situation with a response that is co-regulating. So let's say, you know, if I'm involved in a procedure, and I see someone, maybe their skin reacting in a way that would indicate to me there might be an allergy that we didn't know about. As a medical professional. I'm trained to act, but not react. I'm trained not to like in my face. Go! Oh, my God! What is happening? Now, will I act with urgency? Yes. If I'm seeing, you know, a reaction happen, am I going to think what's the next course of treatment? Absolutely. But I need to act out of. And again, I call it evidence-based reality based. I need to act out of reality, not out of my own manufactured emotions.

And so we don't want to turn people into robots, but we want to help them co-regulate and lead and bring out the best in people, and it's not through their panic. It's through their, you know. Let's all breathe. What do we know for sure? How could we move through this in really helpful ways. And what would be our next right move to do together. And that's the calmness that leaders need to bring into the picture.

What Are the Kinds of Workplace Drama

Cathy Christensen: So I'm curious, you've been doing this for quite a while. What are the common like, what are the common kind of denominators, as far as people issues that you see in small to medium-sized businesses?

Of course I'm talking more about medical spas specifically, but often those are, you know. I mean, we do have chains, but even the chains and franchises are, can be 5 to 10 people under one roof. So what are those common issues that you see, and any advice on kind of addressing those?

Cy Wakeman: Absolutely. So in the book No Ego, which is a lot of what I'll talk deeper about. We know that the average person, a good performer. A very, you know, whether they're playing a role as a receptionist or they're playing. You know, the role of a nurse or nurse practitioner like a great performer spends two and a half hours per day in drama. Doesn't mean they aren't standing around venting, but it does mean that they're working with a grudge. They're working with hardship that is self-imposed. And so when you think about 816 hours a year that people spend suffering needlessly, we were mainly interested in what are those flavors of drama? And that's what you're asking about, like, what are the typical components of that 2 and a half hours a day? And we, through the research, have come down to 5. And once we got the 5 sources of drama. Then I looked at whether what we taught you leaders as far as traditional leadership, how we taught you to respond, whether it diffuses drama or fuels drama, and we have found out that a lot of traditional leadership is codependent, and it fuels drama rather than diffuses drama. So the 5 components are the number one like 32% I think it is, is ego.

Cathy Christensen: Hmm.

Cy Wakeman: Storytelling, judging, scorekeeping, venting, gossiping, talking about someone rather than talking to somebody, like not using your adult words, not using your healthy interaction skills. So the biggest one is ego. And what we as leaders do is, we say, ‘Oh, people need time to vent.’ And that's not true. Venting is a behavior. And so that would be like, you know, saying, ‘Well, we need to give people time to drink at work.’ I'm like, well, that would be ridiculous. Why would we have people drinking at work? ‘Well, that's their release.’ Venting is as unhealthy as drinking. I mean. In fact, probably cortisol levels, venting is more toxic than alcohol consumption.

Venting is the behavior. And so ego is a really big deal for leaders to be able to move people beyond ego. Get them self reflecting. What do you know for sure? What could you do next that would help? How can you move past this? What do you need to let go of to work joyfully today? So, leaders, the biggest way through ego is in drama is using self reflection. The power of a leader isn't what we tell people to do. It's what we get them thinking about, it’s toggling them up. 

The second cause of drama is lack of accountability. Well, if I'm an ego, I'm seeing myself as the victim, and you're the villain right? And so it's easy to not take accountability or find my place of impact. And a job of a leader isn’t saying, ‘Come right here, here's where you can make a difference. Come here, here's where you could have impact.’ Well I shouldn't have to. We're not going to get into ego. But we are going to get into impact. So, let's take care of this today. And then let's look at roles and responsibilities going forward and see if we can’t clear this up. So leaders are a lot about redirecting.

Third point of drama is when people make their buy-in conditional and leaders enable it. I am bought in to do a great job today as long as the schedule runs smoothly, and my providers show up on time and, you know nobody, none of the clients surprise us, and you know, everything runs smoothly, and we have all the, you know, product and prescriptions that we need. And well, that's not buy in. We need to help people understand that true buy-in is, I am here because processes will not always work, and there are people involved, and clients won't always have been clear on the phone about what they hoped were going to happen in the one hour that we have them and some people won't follow up like we asked them to, and some people will be late, even though we said we'd charge them. And like I'm here knowing there will be some reality involved, and my job isn't to succeed in the perfect reality. 

My job is the lubricant that ensures that, given an imperfect reality, we can still have this service level we promised our clients and patients, we can still have great teamwork at work, we can all leave feeling really good about what we did. 

The fourth element is resistance to change creates a lot of drama. And it amazes me, especially in med spas. Because when we're thinking about procedure product service, we are all about the latest greatest we're like, ‘Oh, that is so 1980s,’ we're doing that. We want the newest. We want it fast. But when people are like, we're going to extend our hours by one hour on Tuesday afternoon people lose their minds. They're like, that's too much change, right? And so we really have to help people—leaders, understand this is a leadership conference—how they enable this lack of resiliency.

How to Handle Resistance to Change

Cy Wakeman: And when we roll out change, we listen to leaders. They would do things like. ‘I'm so sorry that we have to make another change. I just know you're all overwhelmed, and I'm really sorry, I want to pre apologize for even bringing this up,’ or even like, you know, ‘Our customers and clients and patients have requested it. But oh, my gosh! I'm really super sorry, but the research shows that we should see open one hour on Tuesday, and it is a way we're going to all make our bonuses. But again, I just want to pre apologize. I'm so sorry I have to ask you to do one certain thing, so if out of the goodness of your heart, you would just try your best.’

And then people are like, wait, people are horrible. Yes, I'm like, yes, they are. If you have drama, it's because you hired it. You allow it, or you are it. And so we got to quit apologizing. People move into med spa environments because we have beautiful offices. We have hours that coincide with our well-being. We are not in, you know, super acute chronic conditions. Like you moved here for that.

That's what you're going to get. But what are you willing to do to get that? And so when I ask people like, ‘What is it that you want?’ I also ask them. ‘What are you willing to do to get that? And then how can I help you?’ Because if you want an environment that serves things up on a silver platter. You probably honestly don't deserve the incredible environment we're going to give you for no effort.

And so we help people deal with change, and then the last one is engagement, and a lot of people have outsource their engagement. They believe that if everything is going great, then I'll give you the gift of my engagement. But what high accountables do is they go? ‘I engage, even when reality is imperfect’ And high accountables really knowno engagement's a choice, and so many leaders believe that engagement and accountability are mutually exclusive. Like if I really foster accountability. My culture scores will go down and we're not here to please people. We're here to create the conditions that they can be at their best, but they're the ones that have to bring their best. So a lot of times people will say to me, ‘I'm just gonna bring my whole self to work.’ and I'll say, Please don't do that. Bring your most evolved self to work because we all serve your most evolved self. I think what people will find is my leadership is reality-based. And it's because it doesn't ignore that reality is imperfect. It teaches you as a leader to call people up to greatness, so that they can move through imperfect realities very skillfully.

How to Communicate Decisions from the Top

Cathy Christensen: Yeah, no, I love that. It's so true. And it's very interesting. And I've been a part or privy to a number of conversations of leaders in really big companies that are starting. They're kind of at a point where they're making like the hierarchy decision to bring everybody back into the office. This is just an example, like larger corporate companies. And it's really, really, really tough.

And it's an interesting conversation, you know, employee benefit versus Is it really the right thing for the company? Will it really affect it, or will it make you feel more in control of the personnel there? Have you had any conversations? I'm just, I’m kinda fascinated by like, who's driving this bus, you know?

Cy Wakeman: So tons of conversations about it. And you know I come out of academic medicine. I like to be evidence-based. And a lot of people are substituting personal research for like evidence-based practice. Because we do know a lot about the fact that as people have left work, they say that they have the best working conditions ever, and the highest rate of depression and suicide.

Cathy Christensen: Mmm.

Cy Wakeman: So like a lot of people are, some of those muscles are weakening. And they're saying, you know, ‘It's easier for me to not come into the office, and it's undue burden for me to make, you know, a three-hour commute.' Now they’ve moved three hours away from the office. And so, for me, I think if you're having an exhausting conversation as a leader, stop the conversation and have a new one. 

So I help people sort this out if you're doing it for the wrong reasons, bringing people back in because you feel better when you can see them in the chair. That's probably not the right reasons. What I advise companies to do is to look at the types of work that we have before us, and honestly evaluate what venue is best for what type of work if I'm writing, I'm an author, I can't be in a noisy environment.

Cathy Christensen: Okay.

Lead By What's Best for the Business

Cy Wakeman: If I am leading people, I can't do that without ever seeing people or spending time with them. If I'm collaborating, the hardest way to collaborate is virtually, no matter what anyone says. And if I'm motivating, it's very hard to motivate people through a one-way screen. So as I look at what I need to do doesn't mean I need to bring my whole staff back in five days a week. It does mean that we have set collaboration time, where you're expected one week a quarter to meet us. We hope it's in a fun place, but you are 10 hours a day with us. It does mean that if you do this certain type of work you're going to need to be in an office setting more often. It also means that your results earn you time away from the office. So if I have to chase you down and you're not creating results, then being out of the office is a reward, not a benefit or privilege. And so, you might need to be closer in the office. So one, we look at the work that needs to be done, and where is the best place to do that? And second, when I talk to people, if a decision's been made, it's not. ‘How do you feel about coming in the office?’ It's like, ‘What's your plan to come into the office 4 days a week, joyfully?’

And if he's like,’ I don't agree with it.’ Eventually I have to say, ‘Then, what's your plan to transition off my team?’ ‘No, I want to work for you, but not be in the office.’ Well, that's a 3rd option. It's not available to you. So I want to work with you, either transitioning off the team or coming into the office joyfully. And well, it's just not gonna be like I'm gonna come in and just sit in my cube and be on Zoom anyway. That sounds like a horrible return to work plan.

And so if that's the amount of engagement that you're gonna give where, when you're surrounded by people, you're still gonna only work with them through the screen. I would consider that really poor job performance. So you well, you know, it's gonna be. It's not gonna improve productivity. That sounds like a threat. It sounds like you have a lot to do with your own productivity. And if you're gonna withhold productivity because you don't like a decision that was made, I really need people that can align organizationally and be all in with the decision made. ‘Well, I get more work done at home.’ What are some of the skills you've done at home to that you can replicate and bring to work? Like we as leaders, gotta get out of the exhausting conversations about. Should we come back or not?

Evidence-Based Research at the Forefront

Cy Wakeman: A lot of research says that there doesn't need to be five days a week, but we can probably get done what we need to do in three days and only work four days. We no longer need to work five days, but we can't do with unwilling, angry, resentful people. And so yeah, that my answer is, there is some individualization to it. But we can't err on the side of people's preferences. We have to really look at what is best for the business. And quite honestly, I think we've mishandled this a lot because we're caring. We're asking people's opinions about things we should ask the research. And your opinion really doesn't matter. 

So bloodborne pathogens. You might say that I can do a better job without gloves on in the office. I would never ask your opinion of that. I would say, are you handling a needle? Then you will have gloves on. Like, are you around like open skin? I don't care what you like about gloves. Evidence would suggest that we need to have a single layer of gloves, sometimes double gloved. This is, this is what we do. And so I think, to win people's love and approval and appreciation. We're inviting opinions where evidence should suffice.

Cathy Christensen: Yeah, no, that's really, really interesting. I have a couple of things I want to touch on with that. But I think you're absolutely right, and I think it feels when you go down that path, that things get very, very complicated. It's really difficult to move in the direction that you know is right, because of all of the opinions.

Cy Wakeman: Think we've got to cut those opinions off in a kind way.

Cathy Christensen: What's like, what would be an example of how to do that? Where you've maybe had a culture, where you've let it proliferate to the point where it's really slowing down production. What would you recommend? As far as like. Cutting to the chase in a kind way, and I can tell by the way you speak, that that you have had many hours working on this.

Cy Wakeman: I try and be. I'm pretty kind, clear, and loving and calm. So if I've kind of let things get out of hand, and I'm in a leadership position. One of the things I like to role model is amend-making and ownership of my part. So I might come in and say, ‘Everybody, what I want to do today is make some amends. I haven't always led you well, and I have confused you, having personal opinions and me trying to cater to those that that's more important than some of the needs for our community and our office environment. And I'm a newbie at this. But I just want to tell you that in attempts to people-please all of you, I have probably harmed the team and harmed our quality and harmed our client or patient experience, whatever you're calling the people you serve. And so I just want you to know, I'm working on this. And there are going to be some things I'm gonna be more clear about. What are things that are some non-negotiables? What are things that are post decision? And where you get input is how we'll make that work. And where I can, I will try and cater to a personal opinion and preference.”

And I think too many people get too permissive, and then they get completely the opposite. They get too restrictive. They're like ‘now none of you can have bathroom breaks without my permission.’ I'm like, Okay, no. 

Setting and Owning Your Boundaries

Cy Wakeman: And what people don't realize, like as a leader, we've got to be good with boundaries. There are 4 types of boundaries. 

Non-negotiables: Here's an absolute limit. A no go. Gloves, right? Absolutely no go. Shoes, no go. You know, those types of things. If something's supposed to be sterile and it's not, no go. How we store things, how we document things. Okay? So those are my non-negotiables. 

Limits: I also need to let people know there are limits and what those limits are, and it's not that you're going to be severely reprimanded, but you need to be mindful of these limits. And that could be, maybe how much we share with our clients, or patient. Like my preference is. if you're presenting Dysport rather than Botox, you don't say because we've had a problem with our distributor and Botox, and they just don't give us, you know, the same service as we used to. If it's an equal product, and you've had somebody on Botox for a while, and they might benefit from switching to Dysport. They might get better, you know product results. Like my limit is that we don't overshare with our patients. If it's good clinical advice, we don't have to give the back story.

Preferences: Then, if you work for me, I will also tell you what my preferences are. You might say 'I like my workspace messy because I'm creative.' I will tell you if you work for me, and you are patient-facing that, it's about my preference, and my preference is based on evidence. How the patient sees the environment looking is how they feel about our quality of care.

Desires: And then there are times for my desires. Now you don't have to be part of my desires, but my desire is, ‘I see, greatness in you, and I know you joined us when you were 19 years old as a receptionist. But, you know, I think you would make a great nurse. And have you even thought about that? Can I get you exploring that?’ My desire would be you stay with us and you get, you know, trained in the following areas.

Most leaders aren't used to owning their boundaries. We don't set boundaries to control other people. We set boundaries to say, if you violate this, here's what I'll do, and here's my invitation to you. So the way I handle where I've done that I wander there, but I'd first make amends, and I'd be very clear about people are like. So you're telling me I have to clean up every day before I go home from work. I'm saying that's definitely a desire of mine.

And then I don't negotiate. So what if I don't? I don't really want to talk about the option of not cleaning up before you go home. I want to talk about how you can do that easily and joyfully. How you can do that and it takes just a few minutes. We've got to be more redirecting to what we know to be true and less argumentative about it. And so that's some of the ways that I would handle it.

And a lot of times I invite people I'm like, look at the energy you're putting into not doing something. What if you put that same amount of energy into doing something easily?

Cathy Christensen: Oh, my gosh! I if I had a nickel for every time I said that to my sons in high school.

Cy Wakeman: Right?

Ensuring Compliance with Standardized Processes

Cathy Christensen: No, I love that. Now I tell me a little bit about your opinion on processes within a company in order to make it sounds to me like there is. It's critical to have your processes and your structure in place in order to do it.

Cy Wakeman: Absolutely. Yeah. So I believe in, you know, we need to manage the energy of people, but not the work of people. And the people's work needs to be run by processes, and especially in medicine, we need to standardize everything we can get our hands on. Variance is the enemy in good care, right? And so that we can make processes. We can eliminate errors. We can make muscle memory. We can. We know we can standardize care, and we make it safer and better. And now, do we need to use processes that are overly bureaucratic? And no, that's really where process improvement comes in. But we do need standardization of the processes. Because if I put in a new process and no one is 100% compliant, I don't know whether the process is achieving the goal we want or not. So with processes comes willing compliance. I need everybody compliant to the process, and when we have full compliance, then we'll know where to improve the process. And so I'm a big believer in standardize everything you can get your hands on, because it frees us up to do the more beautiful, fun, energizing work. 

So you know. Let's take all of these combined. I may have a billing person who says I can bill from home. Like I don't need to be in the office. I don't need to see the patient, and you know, depending on how I feel that day. I'm just gonna, you know. Sometimes I start at the beginning. Sometimes I start at the end. Sometimes I do it this way or that way.

And it's like, well, first of all, let's clean up this work and free you up. And so the first thing I would do is, I would say, we need to have very standardized processes, so we can cross train. People can pick up your work. You can pick up your work easily. We have a good chain of command. We can show the patient very easily to understand what they've paid, what they haven't paid. So we're going to do standardized processes, and we're going to be very clear about those now about you being in the office.

Here's where you add extra value. If you know my name is Cy, and every time you come in I go through your balance and your payment plan, and I'm like ‘I'm Cy. If you have any questions, just call me, and oh, my gosh! The results is so worth what you're spending here. I just, I can't believe it. I haven't seen you for 6 months. It's been amazing.’ When I call you up about an unpaid bill, and you know me, and I'm Cy, and I think you look amazing, and it's going to be so much more collectible.

Now as you standardize, every time you see the sheet in front of you. You know we're on payment number five, and what this is about. We've been through the process. You know me. And I can't explain to you why my collections, my accounts receivable over 90 days is super low but I can tell you it has to do with not working from home, people knowing my name, how I check people in and out, how I talk to them, and my investment in their care, and you can't do that from your couch. That’s what we want for our clients.

Cathy Christensen: Yes, no, I find it's interesting, because even processes within the behaviors that you're talking about too. Being able to say 'This is the expectation,' very clearly it's written out. This is the expectation of performance. And then, when there's a variation from that, it's then easy to say this is the expectation for performance as opposed to, just like, ‘Oh, yeah, we kind of talked about that last week,’ you know, and then it's a nebulous conversation as opposed to an actual process and procedure.

Cy Wakeman: I would agree. I think we underserve people by not having processes that people can count on that bring regularity into their work. And I think people deserve processes they don't deserve, you know, having something rigid, but they do deserve processes. They keep us settled and safe, and routine is super important.

Take Home Reality-Based Leadership Tools at WALC

Cathy Christensen: Yeah, no, I totally agree. Well, I am so like, I think you're a genius. And I wanna be like part of whatever like club that you have. I want to be part of that. I think it's amazing what you do. I'm so excited for your talk. If people haven't registered yet for the Women in Aesthetics Leadership Conference, it's taking place October 3rd through the 5th of this year 2025 at Terranea in Ranchos Palos Verdes. If you haven't checked out our website, experienceWALC.com, you should. If nothing else, to get calmed by the beautiful beachfront location and pictures and everything else. Cy is going to be our closing keynote. She's going to be speaking on Reality-Based Leadership: Ditch the Drama and Turn Excuses Into Results. So she'll be talking a lot about what we talked about today, but more in depth and with a lot more ways to execute that. So please register. Cy, where can people find you? What's the best way to keep in touch with you? I know you're an author. I know you're a writer. Tell us about that.

Cy Wakeman: I've got quite a few books out there. The one that is probably best for leadership is No Ego, so they can buy and read the book. Our website, our company is realitybasedleadership.com. And it's not just me. We have other great speakers and associates that work with offices, big or small all over the world. So if you want to bring this home to your staff, and then we're out there on social media. So whether that be, you know, @CyWakeman, whether that's LinkedIn or Instagram, or there's a professional Facebook page that's not my personal one that will put you in contact. And we have tons of podcasts out there also under reality-based leadership, Alex Dorr is another great resource. So it's more than just Cy, Wakeman, the reality-based leadership philosophy is out there and available to everybody.

Cathy Christensen: Alright. Well, I can't wait to learn more in October, and thank you so much for your time, Cy. You’re amazing.

Cy Wakeman: Well, thank you. I appreciate the opportunity to have a preview with your audience.

Cathy Christensen: Yes, yes, absolutely. Well, thank you so much.

Cy Wakeman is a drama researcher, New York Times best-selling author, Hall of Fame Speaker, and 2023 World’s #1 Leadership Guru who is recognized for her Reality-Based approach to leadership. Backed by over 25 years of unparalleled experience partnering with top brands spanning all industries, Cy’s philosophy offers a modern approach to leadership in which employees and managers alike can deliver better results with less drama, higher engagement without entitlement, and more happiness in even the most challenging workplace realities. Deemed “the secret weapon to restoring sanity to the workplace and the worldplace,” Cy empowers leaders to love their teams up while calling them up to greatness. Her client list includes Google, Meta, Viacom, NBC Universal, Keurig Dr. Pepper, NASA, Pfizer, CVS, Johns Hopkins, Stanford Medicine, Bank of America, among others. As a highly sought-after conference headliner, Cy holds a Certified Speaking Professional (CSP) designation, placing her within the top 3% of speakers worldwide. In 2024, she was honored with the prestigious Council of Peers Award of Excellence (CPAE) and inducted into the Speaker Hall of Fame, recognizing her as a professional speaker who has reached the top echelon of platform excellence by the National Speakers Association.

Wakeman joins an exclusive collective of women entrepreneurs at WALC 2025. Faculty for the event features high-profile experts from the worlds of aesthetics and business, including Jamie Kern Lima, founder of IT Cosmetics. In her keynote presentation, ‘Becoming Unstoppable,’ she opens up about the mindset shifts, strategies, and lessons that helped her transform a company she started in her living room into a billion-dollar brand. Also sharing their wisdom are Dermalogica co-founder and chief visionary Jane Wurwand, BrainTrust founder Kendra Bracken-Ferguson, Triessence founder and CEO, Tessa Todd Morgan, Galderma U.S. head of customer education & key thought leader engagement Carrie Galpin, Resculpt Aesthetics owner Erika Barry, NP-C, RUMA Medical founder Shelby Miller, DNP, FNP-C, Lickstein Plastic Surgery & Medical Spa COO Lisa Lickstein, Luxe Beauty and Wellness Boutique founder Kiiyonna Jones, PhD, FNP-C, Nextech Systems VP of aesthetics Robin Ntoh, and Terri Ross Consulting founder and CEO Terri Ross.